Loneliness vs Solitude
Do we know the difference?
” Loneliness vs Solitude” came about, from asking my daughter what she thought is a pertinent topic, to which with no hesitation … she replied ‘Loneliness’. The isolation, quarantines, and lockdowns that we experienced as a collective, loneliness made itself felt to many of us. I truly wish you get to experience a shift into solitude and self-connection. Who knows some of us get to connect a few dots of our own? So I trust you’ll join those that get the insight that loneliness isn’t just what it appears to be, and so I share with you my views.
Here is the fabulous, astounding Michael Bernand Beckwith to set the mood !!
The more we relate to something, the easier It becomes to find the missing pieces
Loneliness has a lot of layers and depths, some very deeply rooted.
As we know… loneliness lives in every heart, we all experience it one way or another.
We feel alone for different reasons, we experience it differently too. At times not only can we relate to this we can sense it similarly too; Anguish, Torment does feel very, very real to us, myself included, however still is an illusion nonetheless.
“Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.” Albert Einstein
Folks, I’m definitely not saying that we are all delusional, ok? Suppose everything has two sides to it. Negative and Positive, but why is it that the negatives seem to be the default and the positives may or may not even come to light, especially when needed most?
We stress, and curse ourselves, our personal dialogue leaves a lot to wish for. We don’t respect ourselves, look for assurance elsewhere but within and totally disregard nurturing the genius inside of us.
♥ Feeling alone does not mean being alone ♥
Emotionally speaking, in Loneliness the mind talk is about sadness, hurt, and pain again and again, in Solitude even though you are still alone, you don’t feel alone, you’re with yourself; silencing the mind ‘chatter’ is so much easier than you think. “Mind chatter” negative thoughts inhibit our life experience. Hinders inner- peace, and our sense of belonging.
We each experience spells of loneliness and seriously it isn’t a bad thing. Loneliness holds the potential to teach us something, it is thanks to those shadow moments in life, we awake and connect to our inner selves.
We’re all navigating through life as best we know, so wake up, show up and turn your experience into something constructive. By spending time in your own presence you learn a great deal. Being content in your own skin, in your own company, is just the beginning.
- When we plant the seed to harvest a relationship with Self, we reap what we sow isn’t it? A positive mind reaps more of the same so do negative ones.
- When we connect, with who we truly are, authentically, with our thoughts and emotions, we get to know and understand ourselves and others on a different level and dept.
Our internal dialogue makes, breaks, or in the least stagnates us or not at all, what you tell yourself is a choice you make.
“You behold your truth”
It is when we can’t see anything good in and about ourselves, that we know for sure that it is urgent that we give it our full attention. No reason whatsoever can possibly justify you seeing nothing good about yourself – if you go on living looking for proof that you are not good enough, trust me you find it all over and the same is true for the opposite so create the habit to look for confirmations that lift you instead.
Every program can have its settings changed to a different default.
When yours is set to see negative, then that is what you see, of course. The opposite is true too, when your radar is set to positive you will begin to find more positives about yourself too. When we focus on a negative trait, we become self-conscious of it even if we weren’t before. What we tell ourselves often enough, we believe and so we become. The effort of this exercise is the same for either choice, why not then rather focus on what lifts, encourages and motivates us? The habit makes it effortless.
The good news is that you can flip to the opposite side of your coin, any time and every time. You sure can fill up your emotional bank account by changing only the bad habit of not giving a dime about yourself.
No more guilty. No more getting in your own way
Generally speaking, the opinion we create about ourselves for example, and the ‘limiting beliefs’ we nurture within… are the main reason & excuse paradigm we often use to justify bad habits. They are also the very same ones that stagnate and limit us. Yes, or no? For the good of all, I wish that more of us could understand this in some way. This is the mindset of Loneliness.
What does then the other side of Loneliness … looks like? As in for the purpose of shifting from Loneliness to Solitude?
From goodbye Loneliness to Helloo Solitude
My Name is Genious, Nice to meet ME!
I JUST MADE A NEW FRIEND TODAY – ME!
To re-build the relationship between me and my inner self from a clean slate, I forgive and let go of…(you add what you choose to let go or add for the basis in the new agreement with yourself) and assure you will be careful with your new relationship to create and maintain great vibes!
Who would want a relationship that is demeaning, offensive, or oppressive? Why would you want to be a friend of yourself on those terms right? why would anyone else want to be your friend? See? Those are the facets of loneliness, your new relationship is one of solitude.
The difference between the two is that in loneliness the mind ‘talks’ to the emotions loudly, and seriously in all sorts of thoughts that lead to emotions that are the least desirable, but in Solitude, the mind is quiet, in this silence, you can listen to the Soul guiding you to joy.
From now, now, now on you are kind to yourself just as you are to those you love… Treat yourself as you would your best friend, your soulmate is you.
I believe, appreciate and love Myself! – I am open, honest, authentic, generous, and speak from the heart to everyone but most importantly with me too. The universe is taking care of the rest.
...But now in the Solitude of my journey, I set myself to explore the treasures of my soul – I gift I was unaware of but I’d always had inside of me
Why do people crave solitude?
In solitude, it’s easier to welcome simplicity, and with a simple life, solitude comes naturally. The simpler your life is, the less stress you’re likely to have. And simplicity breeds the opportunity to evaluate your personal values, which are crucial to living mindfully.12 Aug 2021
It is when we become the friend that possesses all the great qualities ourselves, the qualities we seek others see in us that we no longer feel alone. That’s one of many experiences of solitude. You are magnificent, you can spend time alone and feel we’ve had the best conversation ever, you can do the things you like to do by yourself because you know you are sufficient and know that the best you can have by your side is you! Because YOU’RE the best! Be your bestie, be your buddy, and be the best you can be with yourself at all times!
Have the Courage to Stand Alone (Find True Belonging) by Brené Brown is what loneliness to solitude looks like
6 Principles for Befriending Yourself: Matt Licata, Jeff Foster
Excerpt: “Here is a principle that has the potential to change your life, if you really take it in: ” TRUE HEALING HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH GETTING RID OF “NEGATIVE” THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS. TRUE HEALING HAPPENS WHEN WE ACTUALLY STOP “TRYING” TO HEAL ALTOGETHER, LET GO OF “HEALING” AS A DESTINATION, AND SURRENDER TO THE PRESENT MOMENT OF LIFE, HOWEVER INTENSE OR UNCOMFORTABLE IT IS. THERE IS UNEXPECTED MEDICINE HIDDEN INSIDE THIS “ALCHEMICAL MIDDLE,” THE WISDOM OF YOUR OWN HEART, RELEASED WHEN YOU TURN BACK TOWARD YOURSELF IN A MOMENT WHEN YOU NEED YOURSELF MORE THAN EVER.” Jeff Foster, Matt Licata continue reading…
“It is love, of course, that guides the reorganization and its unfolding. But it is love, too, that is the substance of the ashes, and also the tears, the tears of grief and the tears of love. If the tears could speak, they may tell us that there is no medicine in a wound that is already healed, but only in one that is weeping.” Matt Licata PhD
Solitude is Desired, Loneliness is Unwanted. The links below couldn’t be better written and may enlighten those that care to understand, wish to find, or get in touch again and spark or start a relationship with themselves.
Is solitude a good or bad thing?
” Solitude is an essential component of your health and well-being. … In fact, building more solitude into your daily life might actually reduce feelings of loneliness. Solitary skills take practice if you’re not used to being alone, but over time, you can grow more comfortable with being by yourself.
Give yourself time every day for self-reflection, and see how craving to be left alone (solitude), is not the same as feeling unwanted loneliness).
5 Ways to transform your loneliness into enjoyable solitude
Keep these promises to yourself:
- I promise to nurture, respect, and love the genius inside of me
- I accept myself as I am, with my flaws and all.
- I am not perfect and I should not be trying this hard to be, I understand and embrace my weaknesses
- I regain my power, by being truthful to who I really am
- I am my best friend therefore I treat myself as such because I treasure myself as I do those I love
- I nurture a healthy relationship with myself
- I have negative facets just as I have many positive ones, I accept that.
- I am mentally and emotionally faithful to myself. I say yes, and can say No when yes or no it is.
- I am valuable, and deserving.
- I won’t let myself down, (pay particular attention here)
Stay blessed, Stay put, in love, for love, with love & Sparkles for your amazingness!!
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Self-Esteem wisdom for Personal Power
Shadow Work to Darn the Heart?
Inner child and why working on it is Self-healing?
Much more… Home
For more on Spiritual Bazar- Solitude Playlist click here includes Tony Robbins and Michael A Singer | Breaking Patterns and Finding Inner Peace
Seatback, chill and Experience your Good Now by Louise Hay
Hello Tana, thank you so much for this beautiful article. It is the most important article I have read for weeks. Thank you for this. I had the privilege to circumnavigate the world with my husband and our dog Susi. We were sometimes two months away from the Land, and humans. This adventure made us humble and strong. Today we don’t have any problems with being alone in times of corona. I love the quietness in nature. Meditate, read, gardning. But I know a lot of people who cannot have this peace and serenity. This article can help a lot of people understanding more about their inner peace.
That is a comment and half. Wow and Thank you. And sure absolutely, you have to experience to truly know the meaning of it, ‘kind of thing. The reason for the article is spot on, I could not be more delighted to know that you think so too. Thank you
I love my solitude, i crave it sometimes. to just be somewhere away from everyone and not have to work towards making other people comfortable or trying to make myself be myself. If that makes sense. Sometimes I simply want to get away and enjoy the silence and the comfort of doing anything without the pressure of other people, or not do anything.
This is a really great article Tania. Your daughter picked a great topic